Posts Tagged "life"

Denial is a powerful thing.  It can make you blind of the truth when it is staring you in the face.  It is the facts you don’t want to see.  You unknowingly live in a reality that you create yourself because you do not want to accept what is actually happening.  It happens to us all.  Sometimes we do it to help us through a hard situation and sometimes we need another truth to live with ourselves everyday.  Sometimes we force ourselves to forget or we prevent ourselves from seeing the truth.  But then there are the times that we need to see the truth and we just can’t.  We need to break through a wall of denial in order to get on with our lives.  We are living in the dark and need to be shown the light.

I had to learn about denial the hard way when I was about 19.  A girl I was dating was a dirty skank and I didn’t even know it.  She was my first girlfriend and she meant a lot to me at the time.  It wasn’t til much later that reality hit me in the face.  I had already moved to Atlanta and was back home visiting.  My friends let me know that truth and it finally broke the barrier of denial.  It hit me like a train.  I don’t think I have ever been so angry in my whole life.  But it made me think.  It amazed me that I could live in such a lie for so long and be totally oblivious to what was actually happening.  Something that was staring me in the face for so long.  There was so many things that told me the truth that I just totally ignored because I didn’t want them to be true.  It scared the shit out of me.  What else am I not seeing?  Could this have happened before?  Can it happen again?  Are there things I am not seeing right now?

The experience opened my eyes.  Not only was I totally avoiding dirty tramps from that moment on, I wanted to be aware of the truth.  The truth of everything.  I wanted to see the facts and let them determine what I see.  I wasn’t going to take pure belief rule my life.  I believed this girl was a perfectly honest human being.  I was wrong.  Sometimes when you believe something is true, it’s not.  Sometimes when you want to believe something is true so bad, there is nothing that can persuade you otherwise.  You will make up false truths to back your own misguided belief.  You will ignore the obvious and concentrate your own made up reality.  In turn, you live a lie.

But where there is skepticism, there is also trust.  Trust is equally as powerful as denial.  Without trusting the person next to you you are alone, but at the same time I think that people lean on trust way too much.  Actually people “trust” without seeing the facts.  Sometimes trust is the only thing keeping people from embracing the truth and eliminating denial.  Sometimes the “truth” is the scariest thing to face.

I feel that being skeptic of the truth will lead you to an answer that will either reiterate your own belief or completely open your eyes to something that you never would have thought of  otherwise.  It could potentially turn your life in new new direction and open your mind to experiences you never thought you could ever have partake in.  I feel that weighing both truth and trust equally is the best way to live your life.  Let your head lead you but trust your heart.  Trust your Mind.  Believe in yourself.