Posts Tagged "caselli wedding"

Priscilla and I bought a house in March of this year. It is a suburbanized home in Smyrna right outside of Atlanta, Georgia. We took our time to find the right one. We worked with a mortgage broker and determined how much we can afford and how big of a loan we can get.  In turn we would know how much house we could buy. Priscilla and I got a kick ass deal on the two story, three bedroom house in Atlanta. The economy told us it was the best time to buy with the home prices and interest rates being at an all time low. We dove in head first and bought our first home. I had saved up some money from freelancing and had a chunk of money from my late grandparents inheritance so we used that money as a down payment and to do some much needed renovations to the house. When we finally moved in we were in a good place financially. We had a great house with money still in the bank. We were happy.

It has been almost 6 months since we have been home owners and the time seems like it has just flew by. Since March we have made several improvements to our new home, some of which we knew about going into it and some we didn’t. When the weather started to turn hot and humid as Atlanta normally does come summer, we noticed that our upstairs bedrooms and closet never seemed to cool down the way they should. I didn’t want to believe we had an issue with our air conditioning, so I put off calling the repair crew as long as possible. Now, we got extremely lucky these first couple of months of owning our first home. The air conditioning needed a new compressor and that was looking to cost over $1500, but our awesome real estate agent David Willard bought us a home warranty on the day we closed on the house as a wedding gift. The warranty covered the entire thing except for a $200 deductible. It was incredibly lucky and we knew it.

The warranty came in handy one other time when our water heater valve was leaking. Only a $50 deducible covered that small fix. Oh, and before the compressor was replace we spent $50 on a deductible for a guy to come replace a non-working thermostat. As you can see, things are starting to add up. We just had our new kitchen table delivered from Room Togo which is just what we needed. It fills a huge hole we had in our main living area and it was something we were planning to buy the moment we moved in. Another expense. The list of things we need to improve or fix grows by the day. Priscilla and I are both somewhat perfectionists and we need to have things a certain way. Because of this I’m sure the list will ever go away.

I love our new home. It is everything I have ever wanted in a house. It is expensive though. Very expensive. I have never been so aware of my finances as I am now. Credit Cards are the devil but they are saving my ass right now. I know things will settle down and my debt will recess, but until then I am watching every bill and pinching every penny. I guess it is good for me. I figured I would eventually have to lean on my credit one day. Living without debt is unrealistic, but I tried as long as I could. It’s a helpless feeling owing money you don’t have. I don’t like it. Not at all. But again I love my house and it’s worth every penny.

My wife Priscilla doesn’t cook.  She never has and I don’t think she ever would have either.  That is until about a month ago when we both decided to trade off days during the week when we both cook dinner.  Not a Fast Food pick up order or a pizza delivery guy.  A real home cooked meal.   Now, cooking a meal at home may seem simple to some people, but to Priscilla, cooking is a really, really big challenge.

Priscilla can clean and organise and even do yard work with all the confidence in the world.  She can take a messy closet and turn it into a rainbow of organised shirts, undershirts, button downed shirts, dress shirts and suits all in order and all color coordinated.  Don’t get in her way when she is in her “”clean mode”.  She is like a runaway train.  She will clean the house til you can eat off the kitchen floor.  I can’t even take a shower two days after she cleans cause it will dirty the tile.  (just a joke there)  She will spend hours pulling every weed in the yard after she mows and edges the grass.  It’s incredible how meticulous she can get over some of the smallest things.

Well, as domesticated as she sounds, she has never been a chef.  Apparently she has never cooked in her life.  Ever.  I, on the other hand, was a line cook in a restaurant for 5 years as I made my way through college, so I know my way around the kitchen.  Now I have always been proud of my cooking ability and have always cooked for myself and then for Priscilla when we started to date and eventually got married.  I didn’t mind then and I don’t mind now but I do want Priscilla to learn how to cook so she can appreciate the world of the Culinary Arts and try new and exciting foods.

Priscilla has always been a picky eater.  Ever since I have known her she has been very particular about what she orders off a menu and what restaurant she attends.  She is usually not  ”in the mood” for anything other than chicken fingers and quesadillas.  She has her moments of being open minded about what she eats, but most of the time she just isn’t feeling it.  The idea of having us both cook opens up the idea of making new foods and trying new things we normally wouldn’t want.  We are letting the other person choose the meal and make it the way they like.  The main thing I wanted wanted to achieve for us both was to appreciate these meals because it took time and effort to create them.

Priscilla was all for it.  She knows she is a picky eater and wanted to learn how to cook.  I would be there to help and she would be there to help me too.  So far the meals ranged from Polenta to frozen chicken fingers.  All in all, we have leanred a lot.  Eventually I want us to take some cooking classes and learn even more.  I want to try new things and cook new vegtables I now consider weird or gross.  Eggplant?  Not sure if that is good or not but I want to try it out.  Priscilla has eaten everythign I have made and cooked up some excellent things herself.  The Pulled Pork was some of the best I have ever had.

I have a certain way of doing things.  I get joy out of my independence.  I think all people in the world do one way or another.  People, in general, try to not only do things they way they want, but they attempt to make other people do things their way.  It’s part of the thing that makes us human.  Life is simply a series of choices.  Choices made by us as individuals.  When we find ourselves in a situation where we cannot have our own way, we get frustrated as we are not in our own comfort zone.  We have to adapt.  Change.  Compromise.

Marriage is a crazy concept.  Being with one person your whole life.  That’s a long time.  And with time, there will be choices to be made.  Choices as individuals and choices as a couple.  In both situations, those choices have a tendency to intersect.  Compromise is pretty much the only way around such a predicament. I think that finding a way to enjoy someone else’s point of view is the way to make compromise feel rewarding. To feel confident in someone else’s control whether their choices are right or wrong. To believe in someone and accept their flaws at the same time.  Easier said then done.

As cheesy as it is, understanding the person next to you is the only productive thing that you can do. Learning how they will react to situations and then, in turn, change your choices to better the situation based on their original choices. But this is no easy battle. I figure I have at least sixty or so years to figure it all out.

I can understand that the original thought of “compromise” is that you are “giving in.” But that is exactly what it is. Yes, it’s a blow to your ego and maybe you are giving alittle of your self esteem too, but in the long run everyone wins. At least that’s what I have picked up so far.

After owning our own house for a couple of months now, I have to add that compromise does, in no way, only hold true to marriage.  Priscilla and I have been blessed with a fortunate life, a wealthy lifestyle and a giant house.  And with great power comes great responsibility.  What?  All I’m saying is that that shit is expensive.  It is only really hitting me now how much we need to change our lifestyle in order to pay the bills.  Mortgage is one thing, but higher utilities, added utilities including water, trash, lawn care and basic repairs.  Looks like shots are NOT on me anymore.  

I guess compromise is a pretty common concept that is involved in everything we do.  Sometimes we don’t get to do what we want to.  It sucks.  But looking at the big picture, not getting what you want is, in turn,  getting what you need.

OK, so we just got back from a fun filled trip we call our honeymoon. We had a blast!! We went to Barbados for three fun filled nights at a All-Inclusive resort called Almond Casuarina Beach Resort. Then we jumped on a very small plane and went to an Island in the Grenadines called Palm Island. We stayed there for three nights then went back to Casuarina for one last night of fun. It was a lot of traveling but it was all worth it.

It all started the moment the wedding ended…

After a fake Grand Exit, Priscilla and I turned around and made our way back to the reception. We just didn’t want the fun to end. Our original plan was to leave the reception at 10pm and make our way directly to my parents rented condo in Atlantic Station to change clothes and grab our suitcases. Then, we were to get back into the limo and it was going to take us to the Atlanta Hilton Airport Hotel for one quick night of sleep before we flew the next morning to Barbados.

That all did end up happening, but only after a few more shots and a whole bunch more goodbyes we finally made our way to the Hilton. Our first stop, McDonald’s. Yep, we had barely eaten at the reception, so we figured we had dieted long enough. (or at least Priscilla did) The limo ride was long and treacherous, but we finally made it to the McDonald’s and we were on our way. The Hilton Hotel was very nice, yet we only stayed in it for about 3 hours. We woke up the next day at 6am and made our way to our 9am flight to Barbados. Our true adventure would soon begin.

No delays brought us to Barbados at 3:30pm. We were already exhausted, but right away things looked interesting. They drive on the other side of the road here? We had no idea. I guess Barbados was a English Colony at one point, thus the reversal in driving directions. It was also extremely hot and humid. It makes Atlanta seem like Norway in the fall. Anyway, we waited for our cab and got on the road. Only a 10 minute drive down the street and we were there. It was called Almond Casuarina Beach Resort. Our Travel Agent June had told us that Casuarina had recently been through extensive renovations, so we really had no idea what to expect. It was incredible. Lush greenery throughout the resort. Odd looking pigeons, doves and lizards were scattered throughout the vegetation. It was a Resort in a jungle.

Anyway, as we waited for our room we enjoyed some interesting Rum Punch Cocktails. The fifteen minute wait became an hour, but we finally got a room and we were on our way. ( the staff here was still new ) Our room was very cool. It was all white with a great view of the pool and the garden jungle. It had a great air conditioning unit, a giant King Sized bed and a 42 inch flat screen TV. We got our bearings and made our way to dinner.

As we made our way around the resort, we noticed that nothing was labeled. There were bars, and restaurants, different pools, and shops, but we had no idea which were which. We finally made our way to the Waves Restaurant for our 6:30pm dinner reservation. The food was good, but we noticed the service wasn’t that great. We had our choice of appetizer, entree and dessert. Everything was included, along with the drinks. Awesome! After a romantic walk on the beach, we made our way to our room and went to bed.

The next day we woke up and went to breakfast which consisted of a buffet of fake eggs, real eggs, hash browns and a lot of other things. All in all it was really good, though the service was never that great at Almond. We then went to the resorts orientation which lets you know about how everything works and the other things to do around the island. We signed up for a Catamaran Boat ride which included snorkeling with the turtles and a ship wreck. We also signed up for a night out in Barbados at Harbor Lights “The Islands most popular, tropical & trendy night spots!!” It was a beach front night club that included dinner, drinks and live entertainment. After orientation, we made our way to the beach to catch some rays.

The next night we had our Harbor night Extravaganza. It was fun. We got on a bus and went 15 minutes down the road to little spot right on the beach. There were a lot of young people and the vibe was popping. We ate steak and fish and saw dancing guys on stilts and fire blowers. We saw this chick limbo under a stick that was literally 6 inches from the floor and on fire. It was pretty cool. Then after the show was finished and trying to get drunk, we made our way back to Almond. We were tired.

The next day around 3pm we had our Catamaran Boat ride cruise thingy. This was awesome. We took another bus through downtown Barbados to the main harbor. We got on a Catamaran and were on our way. We snorkeled with the turtles and saw our sunken ship. We even got to pet the turtles and I saw a giant sting ray. It was cool.

On Wednesday, we checked out and made our way to the airport once again. We took a short flight on a 19 passenger plane that took us to another island called Union Island which is part of the Grenadine Islands. We then took a small boat to Palm Island. Palm island is a resort on a island all it’s own. It looked like paradise. They greeted us with blended cocktails the moment we got off the boat. We had lunch and went to our rooms. It was hot as shit, but very cool. On the way to our room, we noticed a full sized Iguana on our path. It quickly scurried up a tree. We learned they were everywhere on the island just chillin’ and living off the vegetation around the island. Very cool.

Our room was very quaint. It had a mosquito net hanging above the bed, a small air conditioning unit next to the bed, a stocked mini-fridge and NO TV. It was hot as shit in the room, but I figured we were safe with the air conditioning unit. The rooms were open air rooms, so there were no glass windows, only shutters. You left these open all day to try to get some air flow through the place, but it only barely worked. The air conditioning didn’t do a thing. The first night was rough for both me and Priscilla, but we made due.

The food on Palm Island was great. The service was awesome, and the scenery was incredible. It was just hot as balls. (did I mention that?) There were only 30 guest at the resort so we had plenty of privacy. We hung out on the beach most of the time. They had bikes that were free to ride, so we did that and took them to a small trail on the other side of the island called the The Iguana Nature Trail. We saw plenty of wild iguana and hermit crabs. The view from the top of the mountain was unmatched on the island. It was hot as balls.

The next day we chilled on the beach and took advantage of their off shore snorkeling. It was fun, you just swim around a dock and there are tons of fish just hanging out around this 100 yard reef. We saw plenty of fish and a funky eel too.

That night we slept better because we put bug spray on right before we went to bed and ditched the mosquito net. We also bought some Benadryl from the island store which didn’t hurt.

We made plenty of friends on Palm Island including a family from Beaufort, South Carolina. How strange is that? Beaufort is the small town where Priscilla’s parents live.

On Saturday we got back on our Island Jumping plane and headed back to Almond in Barbados for one last night. We got as much sun as we could before we had to come home on Sunday. I think we were both ready to come home. It had been a crazy three weeks. After its said and done, we had a great time. I had to take Monday off just to recharge. ( and write this )